jotting jennifer

When I posted about our wedding bands, you may have sensed some hesitancy on my part about my wedding band. The pair of matching diamond bands were pretty and sparkly and Mr. PB liked them a lot, but they just didn’t sit right with me. Maybe it’s my stubbornness, maybe I’m crazy, maybe I’m just a PITA about things. But I had such a vision in my head from the time we bought the engagement ring and I just couldn’t shake it.

After some hemming and hawing, I asked Mr. PB if it was okay if I looked into exchanging my band. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, and it was his money that bought the band, but luckily for me, he was on board for whatever I wanted. He said that he was able to convince me to get an engagement ring that was out of my comfort zone so I could go with my gut about the wedding band.

I looked at Kay’s website and they didn’t have many options for a ring with gemstones and diamonds but they did have a wide selection of mother’s rings. In my mind, a mother’s ring and a wedding band are pretty much the same concept: a metal with stones put into it. Why not find a mother’s ring that I could customize with the gemstones and call that my wedding band?

Mother’s Ring Customized. This could work… // Screenshot of Kay.com

I called Kay’s to make sure that the person that Mr. PB and I worked with for my engagement ring and the wedding bands was working that day. He was so I went after work. I mentally prepared myself to stick my grounds and get what I had my heart set on.

I brought the mother’s ring idea with me to Kay’s and to say the jeweler didn’t like it would probably be a big understatement. He basically looked at me like I was crazy. He kept trying to convince me the double bands were the way to go. I kept pushing back and trying to suggest other rings, maybe ones with a twist or a design. He told me I couldn’t go for those rings because they didn’t go with my ring. He then pulled out an analogy: “It’s like buying a suit. If you buy a suit jacket, you have to buy the pants to match. But if you get a sport coat, you have more flexibility with the pants.” ***insert cricket noises here*** I don’t know why he thought I knew about buying suits but his analogy didn’t really do anything for me. Basically he was trying to tell me that had I picked a solitaire engagement ring, I’d have more wedding band options but because I picked the ring I did, my options were few. Maybe if the pants that I had my heart set on didn’t get discontinued like he told me they wouldn’t, I wouldn’t have been in the predicament that I was: in search of pants, err… a wedding band.

My hard-headedness continued on and I went back to wanting colored stones. He told me that the reason diamonds were in most wedding bands and rings is because they are the hardest stone, therefore last the longest. He said that the sapphires (both blue and pink) were only one step down from the diamonds so they should be okay, but the amethysts could get cloudy in about 10 years. I asked him how much it could cost to replace the stones, thinking hundreds of dollars. He said about $15 a stone, so $45. If I have to pay $45 every 10 years to upgrade my dream wedding band, I’ll count that as money well spent.

He then showed me an 15-stone ring and suggested the stones be three diamonds, pink sapphire, sapphire, amethyst, three diamonds, pink sapphire, sapphire, amethyst, three diamonds. With his suggestion, I would end up with six small loose diamonds and was back in the same boat of my center diamond lining up with diamonds in the wedding band. I pushed back once again and said that I wanted it pink sapphire, sapphire, amethyst, three diamonds, pink sapphire, sapphire, amethyst, three diamonds, pink sapphire, sapphire, amethyst. That decision was met with hesitancy from him, he warned me we’d have nine loose diamonds and then he said the thing that really made me dig my heels in the ground: “Are you sure you don’t want a second opinion? Are you sure you don’t want to come back with Mr. PB another time?” Calming the fury that was bubbling up inside of me, I told him no, that it was what I wanted, we’d find something to do with the nine loose diamonds and I was sure about it. His reaction: “Well, I guess you will have a one-of-a-kind wedding band then.” Thanks?

He took the time to write the order up and even used markers to color code the stones in the order that I wanted. I left feeling aggravated with the last 90 minutes of my life but confident in the decision I made.

A few weeks later, I received a call that the ring was in and I quickly scampered off to get it. As I was heading to the jewelry store, I had a sinking feeling in my stomach that something would be wrong, that the stones wouldn’t be in the right order. I get there, he opens the box and wouldn’t you know, the colors were in the wrong order. Epic failure. The jeweler apologized and said he would have it fixed. I was sad to have to leave my ring again but after all the hassle, I wanted it the way I wanted it, dang it! I left the store and began to walk out of the mall. I barely got out of the exit doors before I turned around. There was nothing wrong with the ring itself other than the stones being in the “wrong” order. Who would ever call me out if the stones weren’t in the same order as my bridesmaids? It’s still the same stones, it’s still the right color and it’s still the ring that I want. I went back in, took the ring back and quickly snapped off  a photo to Mr. PB.

WHABAM! Love it! (I still have to get it resized) // Personal Photo

In the end, I am super happy with how the wedding band turned out and will look forward to wearing it for many, many years to come. Even if I have to replace a few amethysts

Did you go against a professional’s advice and follow your heart to get what you wanted? Did you realize a minor mishap didn’t really make too much of a difference and left it be?

This past weekend I went to see Mini and she used her skills to help me feel like the Kardashian I dream to be. Per my request, I left the salon with ombre hair!

Selfie in the salon mirror #noshame // Personal photo

Before I left the salon, Mini told me I had to do something with Mr. PB that day, after all I had a fun new hairdo and she took the time to curl it for me. Mr. PB and I had been talking about going to look at wedding bands and I used my fancy hair to my advantage. Off to Kay we went!

We worked with a friend of a friend to purchase my engagement ring and he was working on Saturday. When we got there, he was with a client so we putzed around and browsed until he was available. Seeing my engagement ring was a wedding band with a solitaire diamond added, I figured I didn’t really need to pay much attention to the women’s wedding bands because I would just get the same band as my ring. To make it a little more special, I’d add some gemstones that coordinate with our wedding palette. Boom, bam, done. We looked at some ring options for Mr. PB and after some time, the salesperson was ready for us.

We plopped down in front of the women’s bands and I began to look around the case, not noticing my band right away. Turns out it had been discontinued. Hmph. I didn’t expect to have to think about options so I was a bit thrown off as different ring ideas were being shown to me. I was really in love with the idea of gemstones in my wedding band, we are having jewel tones as our colors, it just makes sense.

Option 1: A similar band of smaller straight diamonds and add gemstones to that.
Problems:
1. The stones in the ring were smaller, just enough to seem off compared to the stones in my e-ring.
2. We would purchase the band as is (with the 11 diamonds) and then have them add the six gemstones in, leaving us with six small loose diamonds that were too small to do much with.

Option 2: Two thinner bands of diamonds to go on each side of my e-ring.
Problems:
1. The bands were thinner and the diamonds smaller so they look slightly off compared to my e-ring.
2. With the size of the diamonds being smaller and there being two bands, it wouldn’t make sense to change diamonds out for gemstones.
3. Option 2 is more expensive than option 1. (but double the diamond weight)

I was debating between the two but Mr. PB was all about option 2. He said “you only get wedding rings once, might as well go big.” How is it the groom is more in love with bling than the bride? There must be something wrong with me! The salesman agreed with Mr. PB and I decided it was indeed better to go big or go home. I carried the rings around with me as Mr. PB checked out wedding band options and kept looking at them, trying to make sure that I made the right choice. Each time I looked at my ring finger, I felt like it was a big band of bling, three straight lines of diamonds together. My poor e-ring seemed to be getting lost among its new neighbors. As I was distracted by all the bling, Mr. PB quickly decided on a cobalt ring.

 
Ring, ring , ring, ring! // Personal photo

Mr. PB and I brought our wedding bands home that day but I left my e-ring at the store to be serviced in preparation for our engagement photos. I kept thinking about the wedding bands and if it was too much with my engagement ring but haven’t been able to look at them all together since then. I even went onto the Weddingbee Boards to try and get some help. With more than 130 votes in the poll, 65 percent of Hive members say to stick with the double rings and 35 percent say to change it for something different.

So what do you think? Should I stick with the double bands and write off my ring regret as being silly? Or should I go back to the drawing board and find a way to include the gemstones like I originally wanted?